Author: drpercuoco

Relationships rarely flourish when the those involved fail to state their desires. The unparalleled passion that accompanies the development of a new relationship can slowly tarnish over time. This is not because of some universal law of physics but rather from a lack of communication. There are many things that destroy a relationship but the two most polarizing are sex and money. If your relationship seems so far away from the hot passion of where it began, perhaps it’s time to get it back. People cheat on each other because someone else makes them feel something they haven’t felt in a very long time, ALIVE. If you’re married or in a relationship with your best friend, then you should be able to share your deepest passions and desires. For many, talking about sexual intimacy can be like pulling teeth. It’s no wonder so many marriages end up in divorce. If you want to get your relationship back on track and growing again, perhaps it’s time to express your desires with your significant other. Be bold, honest, and very detailed about what you want. Life is short so don’t live with regret. SAY IT and don’t forget, what’s good for the goose is good for the gander.

We all experience a significant number of thoughts throughout the day. Unfortunately, many of these thoughts are negative. Negativity holds us back from becoming who we want to be. So, it begs the question, “who do you want to be?” To live a happy and productive life, you must improve the function of your brain. The easiest place to begin is to simply think different. When you’re experiencing moments of anxiety, fear, anger, resentment etc., ask yourself – who do you want to be? This interrupts the pattern of negativity and immediately allows you to make new connections within the brain for happiness, peace and joy.  Do you want to become the person who is anxious, angry and resentful or the person who lives with honor, integrity and respect?   By asking the question and truly focusing on the positive answer, you begin to become that person.  In time, you change the wiring of the brain and condition yourself for fulfillment. It’s up to you!

Throughout your lifetime there will be countless moments, but a mere few will have profound effects on your future. How you respond to these moments will be a testament to your character. You can either choose to see things as a positive or negative; it’s your choice. These moments constitute life experience for which there is no substitute. You simply must go through it. In the end, I think you’ll find that your life was just as it was supposed to be. So, stop worrying, use your time wisely and embrace each moment as a gift. Live your life with passion.

Has there ever been such a generation gap as the one we’re experiencing today? Let’s face it; not all old people are crusty and boring just as not all young people are snowflakes and entitled. The vibrancy, the energy and the potential of the youth is intoxicating.  Unfortunately, some older people have forgotten this and need the youth to remind them of what they’ve lost sight of. The youth seeks the answers (wisdom) that older people seem to have created through a lifetime of experience. Having an open dialogue of communication between the generations could only serve to bring a greater sense of community which seemingly leads to a life worth living.

The modern-day medical paradigm regarding depression is that you have a problem producing serotonin in your brain. That is to say that you have a chemical imbalance that will respond to medications that help increase the amount of serotonin in your brain. This will alleviate your depression and make you feel normal again. This of course is the dogma, but is it accurate? The answer is, maybe but not for the reasons you think. It is now well understood by brain researchers that depression is heavily linked to loneliness. Loneliness is a lethal disease that will kill you faster than alcoholism, cigarette smoking or obesity. You’re in control of your choices but you have to know the truth.

Life can have us running in a number of directions at once.  This can overwhelm the brain and increase the production of stress hormones that, over time, can damage your health.  Often, it’s difficult to detect that you’re in a tailspin because it has become so “normal” to you.  When there’s time off, like the holidays, and you allow yourself to rest, it’s amazing how the body responds.  Sleep improves, mood softens, the body heals and connections deepen.  It’s a reminder that perhaps you can sometimes overdo it and you MUST take time to restore balance and repair before you break.  There’s nothing wrong with working hard to achieve things you want in life but to what end?  Embrace the journey as strongly, if not more than, the destination. 

Sex is a natural part of humanity and is incredibly good for you.  There are plenty of social reasons why sex is frowned upon but as a doctor I can assure you that sex has WAY MORE upside than downside.  Physically sex lowers blood pressure, reduce the risk of heart attack and dilates your blood vessels.  It reduces the risk of prostate cancer, strengthens a woman’s pelvic floor reducing incontinence while driving estrogen levels to a new level.  This is so good for you.  Sex reboots your immune system and overall makes you a physically healthier person.

Emotionally, sex improves sleep while increasing connection between 2 people.  It’s calming and positively affects mood.  It reduces most of the negative effects of stress while increasing the deepness of the relationship.  Don’t fret if you’re not in a relationship; a good solo mission will do just fine.  SEX is wonderful for all things human as long it’s exercised with respect and responsibility.  Is it time to Shag?  It’s up to you.

Christmas is a magical time for many but for some it is a painful reminder of love ones lost.  When you suffer the loss of a loved one, the magic of Christmas might seem more like an emotional burden.  Perhaps rather than feeling pain year after year, ask yourself what that person you loved and lost would think of your perspective.  If you once shared Christmas with them, then continue to share it even in there physical absence.  You get to CHOOSE  how you want to feel.  Perhaps you celebrate their life and continue the traditions of love and giving to others who also might be suffering.   This is what they would’ve wanted.  Christmas didn’t steal your loved one.  Their journey ended when it was supposed to.  Yes sometimes that means at Christmas.  Think about getting back in the game and feeling the love of Christmas and your loved one.  Then take a deep breath, know that you’ll be OK, and help someone else in need.  Merry Christmas.

Pain can have many different causes but none-the-less it’s a very unpleasant sensation.  Unlike pain from a physical injury, emotional pain cannot be measured by a doctor. It’s very personal.  Pain from loss, betrayal, or even loneliness can cripple you and hold you down, if you let it.  Consider seeking counsel and connect with others who can help bear the burden while you feel weak. Stay connected to people who can help nurture your emotional pain with love and compassion.  This is why we’re all here to begin with; to care for each other.  It won’t be long your pain will transform into experience and allow you an opportunity in the future to be someones else’s rock; paying it forward.